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A love affair with appliances

By By Tracy L. Brady
Record Reporter
Call me strange, but I've always had quite a fascination with home appliances.
When I was 14, I asked for a Dirt Devil upright vacuum for Christmas. My parents were more than willing to oblige. Last Christmas, John gave me a cordless Dust Buster. Where most women would have been appalled, I fell in love all over again.
Commercials for diamonds, luxury cars, cruises and designer fashions are wasted on me. Show me a bagless Hoover Windtunnel with enough suction to dislodge a toy soldier from the couch cushions and I'm hooked.
A clothes dryer that knows when the clothes are dry or a dishwasher that doesn't require pre-rinsing will make me salivate more than a Calvin Klein underwear model any day.
An oven that bakes at two different temperatures-don't even get me started.
Actually, I'm rather attracted to anything that makes household chores quicker, easier and more efficient. Forget about computers and Palm Pilots, a life without the Swifter Sweeper or non-scrub bathroom cleaner is a far more frightening thought to me.
My latest fetish concerns cookware. John and I have recently been contemplating our cookware needs and have come to the conclusion that my $100 set of college pots and pans are nearly ready to make their journey to that big landfill in the sky.
The frying pan lid has been missing in action since my last move, so I've been substituting a round pizza pan for over a year now. It works, but lacks something in the attractiveness area.
John hates wooden spoons and is convinced that plastic cooking utensils will melt, so he uses forks and spoons to stir and flip while cooking. Therefore, aluminum is now peeking through where Teflon used to be. Not only is this unattractive, but also poses a potential health hazard.
Just as I know the brand and model of each major appliance I'll someday own, I now also know what type of cookware. I'm talking about greaseless, waterless, and stackable, cast iron interior, stainless steel exterior, non-lid-losing cookware with a lifetime guarantee. I love this cookware so much that I would trade John for it.
Unfortunately, that's exactly what I would have to do.
Bridal events are cruel. Register for this, buy that, book it now, give us a deposit, consider this payment plan…young newlyweds and their families can only afford so much, and it usually doesn't include $2000 sets of cookware.
After meeting my dream set, I went home and cursed and kicked my old college cookware. I decided to keep John and go buy another $100 set of Teflon pots and pans. For now, at least.

Digital Version

Digital version of The Madison Record – April 17, 2024

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